What about Terry Glenn? Maybe she could be coaxed back from retirement?
To be fair to the OP....I knew he was kidding. It's too ridiculous to be true. Not to mention the smiley face in the title.
Actually OP has a solid point.
Imagine the production we could get out of T.O with an incentive based contract? Something like vet minimum + per catch we pay the IRS $5k on his behalf.
How about we just trade all our draft picks for Larry Fitzgerald or Megatron??